puhey fuckers..
hais, just feeling fucked up la.. i getting more frustrated being at home now.. i tink wad jamal said is true lal.. like nowadays, we're getting very annoyed, very angry and very pissed very easily.. i dont know why also lal.. but then its just lidat.. seriously lal.. im very fucked up mood now.. i was ok just now in he morning and the afternoon.. but once my mom comes home this late or wad.. i sudd fell very angry.. cus like the problem im having concerns her...

im angry.. just angry..angry at everyone, and everything.. u noe how like hmm, last time.. my frens would come to me if they have a problem or they just need a listening ear..and sometimes they need "counselling" or sometink.. and i tink personally lal.. i find myself doing tt profession in the long run.. i mean, i like hearing and listening to people.. and i realli feel a great sense of satisfaction when i help them.. haha..
and now i tink im the one who needs counselling.. seriously.. i get very fed up and pissed fucking easily.. even the slightest irritating pest around me can piss me off man!.. seriously sucks.. but i kinda like this feeling..

although, one theory i have is that.. hmm, the people around me, my surrounding, is the reason and the cause of this increasing stress or persuading anger that is slowly opening itself up.. people just dont know me tt well.. they dont know that if im angry, i fucking mean it... itll be the epitome of a crazy bastard.. i almost beat the hell out of my sister when she was in sec 2.. and now.. there is alwaez tt little feeling in me that i wanna kill somebody... i mean it.. im not joking.. i mean, im talking bout killing people here..so i cant possibly be joking..

most of the times even when people call me on my hp or hse phone i get angry.. i wonder y the fuck must u call and make a peaceful and quiet place be so noisy with all the ringing..i cannot surcumb to my anger too easily or it will overpower the peace or the sane mind in me.. but then at the same time.. its hard to avoid this feeling..

hmm, ok, on to other things i wanna talk bout here.. so we think that we are a democratic country.. to set things straight before i continue ranting, i noe of the new law or thing that says its not legal to blog any political tink or sometink anymore.. and im not here to do just tt.. i don tink that this beautiful country (see how i didnt specify any particular country to avoid legal suits) that we're living in is totally democratic.. i mean they say a freedom of speech or so u thought.. but then, we cant even blog our feelings and expressions.. freedom of speech my behind ( im trying to be polite here)..

and we say equality? the only equality i see is if that u either have the greens or be lean...
don fucking understand wad im talking bout?
im trying to say.. that PEOPLE only treat u fairly.. if u have 2 things... MONEY and LOOKS.. money can bring u the world.. and don give me crap bout u don need money for anything cus living here.. everything can cost u.. there is nothing here (here can be anywhere) u can take for free..

and looks? gimme a break u fucking assholes... i noe ok, fine, i might be horizontally inclined, or in short fat, but i till have feelings lal u mother fuckers.. u see ar... ok, u might make fun of us, me or whoever that is big.. and we might be laughing on the outside.. BUT trust me.. inside, we're/ im cursing the fucking shit at u... TRUST ME! cursing the fucking shit at u... sometimes, on the bus, when like we ( the big ppl) sit on the bus chairs.. can u guys pls be kind and sensitive enuff to at least sit next to us?! and at least give us some face.. u fuckers will sit next to us only if we're the last resort or unless we're the last humans on earth.. and cus of u matha fuckers, other people look at us..and think we're unconsiderate bastards who wont offer a seat to anyone... wtf rite...i don even noe wad to say lal... its all discrimination for the people who look different! all u lean mean fucking bastards out there.. don think tt just cus we're fat and all we are probably gonna die earlier.. but guess wad?! the chances of u lean people getting a clogged up artery and all is also quite high u freaking bastards.. so much for equal opportunity and treatment!

id give u one example.. jobs.. let's see.. its almost impossible to find a job temperary or permanent if ur big! like any uniform will hardly fit u.. ive worked at a hotel bfore.. and the only department i can work at is tt particular one cus the other departments, the there is no uniform size.. i don get it.. like halo?!!!.. u son of bitches and matha fuckers... so wad?! only the thin and anorexic people should work and we big sized people should do wad?! stay at home and fuck ourselves?!! the world is a totally bitch place.. if ur big or fat.. people look at u DIFFERENTLY.. like as if ur a god forsaken alien la!.. we're still fucking humans u matha fuckers!! its just tt stereotypical sentiments that fat people cannot do certain stuff.. they say, fat people cant dance no shit.. but hey, guess wad, i tink i CAN dance better than most of u people out there man!.. so yeah, suck on tt!
go rot in hell lal.. SHALLOW thinking only shows one thing bout u... ur brain is too fragile to process too much facts and truths so u depend and u believe on the normal-people thinking about life..

we might not be fast in reaction time or wad shit.. but who gives a shit.. and some people think wad... they wanna find job.. but nv call me cus scared later i cannot tahan the job?! fuck tt shit la.. pls lal.. which job is not tough?! i noe lal.. u might be concerned with me.. but halo.. ive been living 18 yrs of my life without ur help.. so ur help now doesnt change anything! and worst some job that says BILINGUAL speaking person... the BILINGUAL actually means u must be able to speak ENGLISH and CHINESE.. so many times alredy tt happens.. it was even brought up in parliament and all.. i tink its not fair for companies to have tt kinda rule lal.. i mean.. we, the non-chinese speaking people can also learn.. i mean im more interesting in chinese things than my own race.. its just lidat.. but how bout the other people who cant speak chinese.. does tt mean they cant work just cus they're monolingual?

anyways, this is just a part of my thoughts for the day.. i tink ill continue with the other fucking thoughts i have about this fucked up world.. and the fucked up ppl living in it!!..

so till then fuckers.. i cant be bothered if u wanna read my blog anot lal.. im just writing to vent my anger and utter frustrations.. and at least i have somewhere to talk things out..

so fuck off...

i don ask for much.. just equal treatment and better judgement..

*fuck out*